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So, here we are, two forty-something's, although my wife insists she is still in her 20's..in denial more like it. We are the Wakerley Wonders who managed to complete all the
checkpoints within the time-limit.
We enrolled for the race about 3 weeks out. So I felt it was appropriate to get fit. A couple of ½ hour slow walks after work over the first 2 nights bought me to peak fitness and
then I was ready to taper. One week out and I was ready to build up my reservoir of carbs. Cream in my yoghurt, cream on my pudding, cream in my coffee..
As part of our pre-race strategy, on the Sunday prior, we traipsed all over Brisbane looking for allusive landmarks, we found so many, and apart from Race HQ, none were of any help
on the day! However, I do recommend the hearty big breakfast at Jimmy's on the Mall!
Before I knew it, we were at the starting line. After the pre-race briefing, we were off, I staggered the 50 metres to get the clue sheet. We had several aims in the race.
One was to average 15 minutes per check-point. By the time we deciphered all but one of the clues (that nasty GPS one), and finally left the starting area, we'd burnt up 20 minutes!
Our first checkpoint was Race HQ. We finished that and realised we had used up around 55 minutes of the race already. We almost landed on the chat statue - now that would
have been uncomfortable! Caught the Ferry across to the Story Bridge, and things seemed back on track. Next and our 1st big mistake followed. Didn't realise that Kangaroo Point was a
really, really, really long area and wasn't just beside the Maritime Museum, otherwise might just have taken a leisurely stroll to the Segway's, but thats another story.
We needed to do the Mowbray Park checkpoint. Plan was to grab the City Cat next to Captain Burke's Park. "Dash it all. The city cat doesn't come to this side. Need to get it from
the other side." But alas, we were across the river as it left from Eagle Street. Wise counsel would have suggested crossing the river and getting the next one, but again, that's
another of those "another" stories.
So, back across the river anywayz to Eagle Street, made a New Zealander really happy by swapping a solid gold $20 Aussie dollar for a poor under-performing Kiwi dollar;
realised that, although we'd resolved the currency clue, we'd just made the world's worst every currency trade. Oh well, here comes another Red Cross donation! Shame they wont be
able to buy much with it!
We now think "Let's buy the copy of the BIG ISSUE we need to help us sort out clues 12a and 12b". Bought a copy at the corner of Queen and Edward Sts. Walked towards King George
Square to find the Bike thingy clue and realised that the Adelaide Street entrance is just so, so, so, far removed from the other end where we need to be we may as well come back to
it at the end so we headed towards the Botanical Gardens now that we have 12a and 12b sussed. A quick (fairly rapid walking by this stage) trip to the gardens, Notice our nice
"ridiculously long" trip from Eagle Street to the Botanical Gardens? Not overly efficient I must agree. Found the 2 statues in fairly quick time thanks to the nice and helpful people
at the Info booth in the gardens.
We then headed towards South Bank, via the Goodwill Bridge, to find Monte. And nearly ran into him on the QUT side. Of course we knew that's where we'd find him!
We were really rolling now! All we needed to do now was head just around past the Maritime Museum to find Kangaroo Point. ..It's just past here..I know it is..Must be around the
bend then.Many, many, many steps later we did find the Segways, and must admit they were mega sick! If only the kayaking was. But of course, that's another one of those another one
of those other stories to come.
At this stage we still didn't have the answer to that nasty GPS clue so we still needed to get to Mowbray Park. So clever me says "let's go vertically up the Kangaroo Point stairs
and run (moderately paced walk by now) to the park. It's not that far on the map." Um.It's not a nice set of stairs getting up them cliffs I'm here to tell you. Maybe 30 minutes later
we arrived at the park. Did the movie names in less than 10 minutes and off we ran (slow, slow walk) to the Chalk Hotel. The dear wife thought it would be nice for a balding middle
aged male to do pole dancing. Of course no such activity would be complete without the requisite happy snaps on her mobile phone. Thanks dear!
Good news followed. We managed the rare use of Brisbane's apparently "world famous public transport system". Um.After 4 hours we'd again found something going our way. What a joy!
And quickly onto another bus that almost got us to the West End Markets only to find that the Chicken Man was "sort of" at the markets, like being at the markets when you aren't quite
there. Meanwhile, we'd had what we'd thought was a really great break. We had been given the location of the kayaking. "Yes" we yelled. "We can give Suncorp Stadium a miss, making up
valuable time". Little did we know! We knew that the kayaking was just down the river from the markets. What turned out to be around 1km felt like 10.
But undeterred, we took the news well that we both had to do this activity. Also, that we had to kayak around 2 buoys whilst dodging any city cats and speedboats. Well I'm happy to
announce that the first 2/3 of this activity was either against the tide or across it and that said wife and me almost failed to make it, but, maybe 30 minutes later, we turned the
last buoy, and with great relief, I realised that it was now just a matter of drifting home.
I was so exhausted I decided to lay back and rest.....Bad, bad, bad idea people! The kayak laughed at me as it did a classic Eskimo 180 degree roll placing us not so gracefully into
the drink. And drink is appropriate as both of us couldn't avoid taking in a nasty quantity of Brisbane Rivers' not so finest. Unfortunately wifey says I will be for every known as
"Lay-Down-Sally". A bit harsh don't you think?
We did get rescued and we offer a heartfelt show of gratitude to the great guys working on the Hale St Bridge that performed this heroic feat, without whom we may well have become
shark bait. The postscript to this is that my mobile phone is now being answered by several large eels that reside at the bottom of the river. Phone 555-MORAY for more information;
wife says 555-MORON.
But come on team, there's a race to be won. So again, of we ran (slow, painful, both legs horribly cramped for 5 minutes, dripping wet) back to the Cultural Centre to get to the King
George Square Bike Centre to argue over whether there were 18 or 19 bikes (I of course was wrong, sorry Dear!). Realised that, with the aid of the Fast forward we'd now finished, we
could grab a bus to Roma Street and finish the race. Final indignity was provided by this "world class public transport service". Bus was due in 2 minutes, 1 minutes, 14 minutes..#@$%^&#
Oh well, guess it was appropriate that we should sprint (still extremely slow walk but at least the cramping had stopped) the last few hundred metres to the end. Arrived in 5 hrs 46
minutes with a clean sheet and was surprised to hear the comment by the Marshall that she seemed surprised that we'd managed all the checkpoints. What was this? Were we in with a
chance? Was it more difficult than we'd realised? No, we'd just missed out in our category by 24 places and 3 hours and 1 minute. Yes, dear readers, we'd "Missed it by that much".
In summary, it was our first race and we made many mistakes but have learned a lot and we had a fantastic time. We noticed a high degree of camaraderie between contestants. also there
was a very noticeable recognition factor coming from the public. One couple asked, "Didn't you do this same race in Perth?"
Because we felt that our fitness might be a slight disadvantage, we felt that our "smarts" would be the key. ..What with backtracking too many times, walking most of the way, hardly
using public transport, duhhhh. Smarts? Whart smarts?..And me a member of Mensa!
I do suggest that a fourth category should be considered, a "Masters" category, whether it be over 45's or over 50's, as there is a high involvement by us "not-so-youthful" types.
