Team MG

By Adam Goc

Our preparation consisted of team captain Louise giving up smoking for three days, reading how to use a compass from a second hand book on orienteering (circa 1980s judging by the outfits), one team meeting to argue about how early we should get there before the start and endless conversations about the impact of the tide!

Sometime after reading the words ‘ignore the tide at your peril’ we had both become fixated on this aspect of the race. Mastering the tide should be a far easier proposition than training. Louise had even drawn up tidal flow diagrams with peaks which she had mapped on the river, all very impressive.

Arriving at 6.15 (I was right about the traffic at that hour) it soon became apparent that there were going to be some serious competitors i.e. people who had done this before. The kayaks were a dead give away. But everyone was very friendly, perhaps because they immediately assessed we were no threat to their chances of victory.

We registered and received our map and set about planning a course based on our wise assessment of the tide and our estimate of 5 kph kayaking speed. The guys next to us saw us struggling with our map and offered us some contact and gave advice on equipment. If only we had run our ‘tidal’ plan by them. Our plan was to spend the early part of the race going against the tide getting as many points as we could, then use the change over to go as far up stream as we could so that we would be going with the tide at the end – when it really mattered.

Our kayak was loaded down with snacks as we powered off with every one else at the start. This was the first time I had held a paddle in 20 years but following the advice of the organiser ‘paddle together - you will look like you know what you are doing’ it felt ok. ‘We can do this for five hours, no worries.’

The first control point was easy. Just follow everyone else up the hill. Luckily I had the checkpoint sheet tied to me so I couldn’t forget to bring it (as more than a few did). Then the run down the hill, all the while thinking how embarrassing it would be to twist an ankle on the first checkpoint.

With our first points in the bag we jumped back in the kayak and headed off, in the opposite direction from almost everyone else. Louise studied the map en route. [Louise had a theory which evolved throughout the race that we should never stop or rest, that one of us should keep paddling at all times.]

With nothing else to compare it with, paddling against the tide didn’t seem to bad. Who knows how slow we were going. We headed down the north side of the river keeping close to the bank ‘the current is strongest in the centre’ (Louise’s tidal tip number 7). We got the next couple of check points without any drama. We can keep this pace up cant’ we?

Owing to the fact that we had to put everything of paper in our map case (we had refused the kind offer of contact – big mistake) our clue sheet was always covering exactly the bit of the map we needed to see. Every time we opened the map case to move it everything got a bit damp. The clue, 40 meters north west of the ramp was straight forward enough, but the only feature on the map we could make out was a small jetty. We spent the next 20 minutes frantically searching around shore while a mangy dog barked at us and it’s owner asked why we were running around aimlessly in her back garden. Finally we decided it must be further up and sure enough, who would have thought it, a ramp!

With another 10 points on board we had a major tactical discussion. By our calculation checkpoint 16 was about a 5 km return trip. There was much discussion about whether this bit of the river was flowing up or down stream and how long it would take us. In order to keep to our tidal schedule we wanted to be heading up river no later than 10.00. We decided we couldn’t make it and hoped no one else could either.

Instead we headed further down stream to collect all the points around the area this side of the bridge before turning back to ascend the hill.

The best thing about the 100 meter rule is if you are the fastest person not only do you get to have a break but you can impart a sense of guilt in your partner without having to say anything, just standing waiting is enough. Better still encouraging them or saying “Don’t worry, it’s fine.”

I enjoyed the run as it gave my shoulders and hands time to recover. For some reason my right hand was cramping and hurting quite a bit (poor paddling technique). So any time out of the kayak was welcome.

It was 10.15 and all we had to do was paddle the right the way up river and then enjoy the fruits of our planning and cruise back home on the rapids once the tide turned fully.

By this stage we were both starting to hurt but kept up a steady pace for the next hour. Still not allowed to stop, I paddled while Louise consulted the map. I did wonder why this had to be done at regular intervals given that we were just going up stream as far as we could but trusted her judgement.

I had a nasty cut on a finger (carving lamb while drunk) and the Band-Aids had come off where I was holding the paddle. Given that Louise is a doctor I expected a little bit more sympathy when I asked if we could stop to re bandage it. “Can’t you wait until the next checkpoint?” “Didn’t you take some sort of oath to heal the sick, we don’t even know how far the checkpoint is?” Our competitive streak won out and I suffered on, but not in silence.

We had eaten nearly all our food and GU and were both tired. The only thing that kept us going was the thought of how easy it was going to be on the way back – why we won’t even have to paddle. We made it up to check point 1 by about 11.15. “If it really is submerged I am diving in” said Louise. Unfortunately it only required lifting it up a bit. We now had an hour and forty five minutes to clear all the checkpoints back to the finish.

We turned around hoping to notice a marked difference in boat speed. The only thing we did notice was a head wind. The fact that the checkpoint was still submerged and that it still looked to be very high tide should have given us a clue. If there was a ‘strong current / tide’ I couldn’t detect it and we seemed to be going about the same speed… slow.

The checkpoints were all pretty straight forward and just involved lots of paddling. As a voice of reason I suggested we take it easy as we had plenty of time. Louise, on the other hand, pointed out that it might come down to a count back on time and that we should try and get home as quickly as possible. This also made sense as the sooner we got back the sooner I could stop paddling.

Again the run up the hill to the tower seemed easier than paddling, despite the terrain of rusted car carcasses, and the 100 m rule meant I could exact a bit or revenge on Louise for driving us so hard. Back in the kayak we didn’t speak just hunkered down and paddled to the line and with over half an hour to spare. I don’t think we could have gone any further. My shoulders hurt, I couldn’t open my right hand or lift my legs. But it felt great. We had completed the challenge to the best of our ability and both of us could not stop grinning.

The fact that we had seen virtually no other kayaks up our end of the course for the last couple of hours led us to conclude we were going to lose big time. At least finishing early meant we got to enjoy the sausage sandwiches (2 each – thank you 2nd Padstow Scouts) before the other teams. When the results were finally posted it was a pleasant surprise that we had finished so well not to mention getting a prize. But no sooner had we learned the results than we began working out to do better next time.

Postscript:
This race report has taken a few days to complete as my right hand only started working properly again on Tuesday. Despite the pain I can't wait to get back into a kayak. Louise is back on the fags but during the time since the race we have both been busy working out a race calendar and training program for the year.

A big thanks to MaxAdventure for organising such a fantastic event which catered both to experienced racers and soon to be experienced racers like us. If we can complete this then anyone can if they have a go. I can not recommend the experience highly enough

Adam Goc
Louise Murray